One of my favorite quotes is from Stephen Chbosky’s book, The Perks of Being a Wallflower; “We accept the love we think we deserve.”  The reason that this matters so much is that most of us don’t really believe that we are deserving of better treatment, so we allow people to treat us in a way that isn’t good enough.

Like so many of our problems, this one is frequently passed down from our parents.  If they treated you in a way that was less that what you deserved, then you got used to that treatment, and came to feel that it was acceptable, even though you didn’t like it.  Now, when you’re in your own relationships, you allow people to treat you in a way that is less than you deserve.

So the challenge is; how do you break the cycle?  The first step is to believe that you deserve better treatment from the people in your life.  This will probably involve ending relationships that you are in now, and finding better ones.  You can give people the opportunity to change, but for the most part, people will keep doing what they have been doing.  It doesn’t mean you need to dislike these people.  It doesn’t mean that they are bad people.  It just means that if they aren’t making your life better, then you don’t deserve them in your life.

Find people who make you feel better about yourself.  Find people who challenge you to be a better person.  Find people who think that you deserve the best.  You know why?  Because you do deserve the best.