So, you messed up. Now what do you do?

We’ve all been there. We make a bad choice, or a series of bad choices, and now we just feel bad about where it got us, or who got hurt in the process. How do you take that negative and make it okay?

First, own it. Don’t try to put it on someone else. Even if someone else was involved, take ownership of your own actions.

Second, if you hurt someone, make amends. Tell them that you messed up, and you’re sorry. Don’t make any excuses for yourself, just own it and apologize.

Third, give yourself permission to feel bad about it. Sure, every cloud may have a silver lining, but when you’re in the middle of the storm, you can’t see that silver lining, and that’s okay. You can take time to work through it.

Last, move forward and learn. What did you learn about yourself, or about someone else? How can you avoid making that same mistake again? How can this experience make you more understanding of other people when they make mistakes? How can this make you a better person?

Don’t treat yourself like you’re supposed to be perfect. You are a flawed human who is going to keep messing things up. If you keep messing up the same thing, then it might be time for some outside help. But for the normal mistakes you make in life, give yourself permission to be human, and try to learn as much as you can from every experience.